Book of Mormon Stories chapter 4

1 Nephi 4

1 And it came to pass that I spake unto my brethren, saying: Let us go up again unto Jerusalem, and let us be faithful in keeping the commandments of the Lord; for behold he is mightier than all the earth, then why not mightier than Laban and his fifty, yea, or even than his tens of thousands?

Do not underestimate the importance and impact of inclusive speech; "us" versus "you" (i.e., "Let us go ... again" instead of "Come on you guys!").

3 Now behold ye know that this is true; and ye also know that an angel hath spoken unto you; wherefore can ye doubt? Let us go up; the Lord is able to deliver us, even as our fathers, and to destroy Laban, even as the Egyptians.

How do you help each other be faithful, strong, and obedient? What are you doing that discourages obedience in your siblings? Do you bear your testimony to each other? When was the last time?

4 Now when I had spoken these words, they were yet wroth, and did still continue to murmur; nevertheless they did follow me up until we came without the walls of Jerusalem.

What do you (or should you) do with sibling versus sibling anger?

5 And it was by night; and I caused that they should hide themselves without the walls. And after they had hid themselves, I, Nephi, crept into the city and went forth towards the house of Laban.

Who comes up with the plan? Can you follow someone else's plan; can you both follow and lead?

6 And I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do.

Have you ever felt led to do something? Sometimes, it comes as an idea, just a thought, that in hindsight you recognize as important. If you don't record those experiences, share them with others, you will forget them!

9 And I beheld his sword, and I drew it forth from the sheath thereof; and the hilt thereof was of pure gold, and the workmanship thereof was exceedingly fine, and I saw that the blade thereof was of the most precious steel.
10 And it came to pass that I was constrained by the Spirit that I should kill Laban; but I said in my heart: Never at any time have I shed the blood of man. And I shrunk and would that I might not slay him.
11 And the Spirit said unto me again: Behold the Lord hath delivered him into thy hands. Yea, and I also knew that he had sought to take away mine own life; yea, and he would not hearken unto the commandments of the Lord; and he also had taken away our property.

If you had absolute power over your enemies, would you be reluctant to destroy them? Can you see how Nephi's act was not vengeance? We hope that violence will always be a difficult step to take for you!

14 And now, when I, Nephi, had heard these words, I remembered the words of the Lord which he spake unto me in the wilderness, saying that: Inasmuch as thy seed shall keep my commandments, they shall prosper in the land of promise.
15 Yea, and I also thought that they could not keep the commandments of the Lord according to the law of Moses, save they should have the law.

How well do you know the commandments? We, your parents, want you to prosper

18 Therefore I did obey the voice of the Spirit, and took Laban by the hair of the head, and I smote off his head with his own sword.

Remember Nephi's reluctance; even so, we hope if you are asked to do something, and frightening difficulties impede you, that you will demonstrate good will and creativity in adapting and overcoming all obstacles.

24 And I also spake unto him that I should carry the engravings, which were upon the plates of brass, to my elder brethren, who were without the walls.
25 And I also bade him that he should follow me.
26 And he, supposing that I spake of the brethren of the church, and that I was truly that Laban whom I had slain, wherefore he did follow me.

Nephi is planning on delivering the plates to his brethren; do you give your siblings the chance to save face? How do you honor each other? Is family teamwork and solidarity important to you? Was Nephi engaging in deception; is it OK to lie sometimes?

28 And it came to pass that when Laman saw me he was exceedingly frightened, and also Lemuel and Sam. And they fled from before my presence; for they supposed it was Laban, and that he had slain me and had sought to take away their lives also.

What do you think "exceedingly frightened" means? Worried about Nephi? Protective of each other? Do you worry about the welfare of your siblings (and not just yourself)?

29 And it came to pass that I called after them, and they did hear me; wherefore they did cease to flee from my presence.

Do you recognize each other? Do you know your siblings, their patterns, their strengths and weaknesses?

31 And now I, Nephi, being a man large in stature, and also having received much strength of the Lord, therefore I did seize upon the servant of Laban, and held him, that he should not flee.

Recall that just a few moments ago, Nephi decapitated someone to accomplish his goal. Here, he just grabs him. What does that teach you about proportionate response? Are you careful to only ever use as much force as is reasonable?

32 And it came to pass that I spake with him, that if he would hearken unto my words, as the Lord liveth, and as I live, even so that if he would hearken unto our words, we would spare his life.
33 And I spake unto him, even with an oath, that he need not fear; that he should be a free man like unto us if he would go down in the wilderness with us.

Are you trustworthy? Would someone be able to entrust their life into your hands on nothing more than your word?

34 And I also spake unto him, saying: Surely the Lord hath commanded us to do this thing; and shall we not be diligent in keeping the commandments of the Lord? Therefore, if thou wilt go down into the wilderness to my father thou shalt have place with us.

How will you welcome newcomers to our family?

36 Now we were desirous that he should tarry with us for this cause, that the Jews might not know concerning our flight into the wilderness, lest they should pursue us and destroy us.

Note; "WE were desirous"; remember that Nephi writes this story decades later, knowing the choices his brothers would make. And he still gives them credit; including one another in victories and good choices is an important manifesting of humility. Can you see how their welcoming was not just neighborly, but also self-protective? Do not be gullible when your fate is in the hands of strangers; trust in small doses, but verify!