A Day in the Life of a Single, Unemployed Dad

Not "single" as in unmarried, but singular, solo. Mrs. L has gone TDY to do some painting for her family, so I'm here, coping.

That is not a plea for sympathy. Our house runs very smoothly, we've put two decades into teaching the kids how to participate in the operation, and they are fun to take care of because they really do help a lot. But it is worth noting here a scriptural fact I have mentioned often. In the story of the creation, God creates everything, names everything, and at the end of each period of creation, reviews and comments. Everything is good. Until he makes Adam. The first aspect of creation to receive a negative response, "It is not good for Man to be alone"

So we are good, but it's busy. My Dad teased me a little the week after I lost my job, suggesting that I was now, "A man of leisure." I frowned at him, telling him I wasn't sure if I was ready to joke about it yet.

But I suppose I needed the light-heartedness. It's critical to not get bogged down.

I look for work everyday. I used to do it while Jenni taught seminary, but while she's away, I'm her substitute. It takes time, at least a couple of hours, to look over all the web-sites, and then to fill out the online applications. I learned to keep a plain text, suitable for cutting-and-pasting, resume and job history open in a word processor. It gets to be a drag to have to re-type your job history a dozen times a week.

The most productive (productive-feeling; nothing I have done has produces any actual results yet...) thing I feel like I do is networking. Calling associates I knew at work, asking if they know of any openings. I've found dozens of jobs that way. But I've found several prospects via Monster and Hot Jobs, too.

Teaching seminary is exhausting and rewarding. The kids tend to be pretty subdued so early in the morning, but most of them are attentive, eager, thoughtful. They are wonderful, and I love the lightness they bring into our home.

Jennilyn has been inspirational, helping me to avoid devolving into navel-gazing mopery. When the year began, and I thought my employment was secure, we joined a health club with a year-long membership. We have been taking full advantage of that, going 4 or 5 times a week, trying to wring as much value out of the already-paid expense before it expires. I am trying out the "couch to 5K" program of running. My kids chuckle at my sore legs.

We have no TV, no netflix subscription. You would think without work taking up 10-12 hours a day, I would have a lot of free time.

But I have inserted myself into most of the home-business of getting kids to school, making dinner, cleaning. Friends and neighbors have been mindful of us, offering small one-off jobs to me, babysitting to Jennilyn. Our families have pitched in as well, hiring us to do their Fall yard work, or painting their house.

I've loved the chance to be around the kids more. Last year, I only ever got to go to one of Stewart's wrestling matches. This year, I've already tied that; he got the fastest pin at their first meet Tuesday night, an exhibition against Elkton. 59 seconds, whoo! I think the fastest over the course of the entire year last season was 20 seconds, so I am sure that record won't last. But exciting to be there and witness it.

There is more time for church work. Jenni gently reminds me that she wishes I would spend more time writing. Which I am trying to do via blogger also, another facet of our life where she is a good example, a great inspiration.

There are house projects to keep me busy (Hey Mrs L, I fixed your slow-draining sink!), but I try to limit myself to one or two a day. It is overwhelming to think of how much needs to be done, and I can't get overwhelmed. I need to stay positive and optimistic, I need to find a job. If I go from room to room, despairing at how much I don't have to spend on projects, I become tempted to just sink into a funk of denial.

There is not much I really miss about work. Certainly the sense of accomplishment in earning a living, the security of it. I miss some of my fellow employees, their light hearts and cheerful demeanors. I miss taking the train, and watching the turtles in the creek while I crossed the pedestrian bridge. I have been deliberately looking at jobs I could commute to on the train.

Even with no TV, Jennilyn and I watch a few TV shows together, but not many, really. Having been without a cable or satellite subscription for over a year and a half now has made us very choosy, very discerning. If a show is boring, or sleazy, or unentertaining, it's easy to just not watch it (especially since we have to seek shows out online or get them from the library). One strike and you are out.

It's funny how my relationship with food has changed since I lost my job. I no longer pack away single servings in the freezer; I don't take lunch anywhere. Food prep could be a simple place for self-pity, so I really try to not self-indulge. Using the extra time I have to try and eat right makes the day more pleasant.

We have appreciated the prayers and thoughts of our friends. If you have any ideas of where else I could be looking for work, let me know!